Attendant's View Blog and Cartoons

Hours of Operation

13/11/2020

museum opening hours

I actually had to be part of a situation like this.

The venue had failed to think through the full ramifications of opening times and staff hours, but it was eventually worked out, although had an understandable knock on effect on new staff who had been planning their travel arrangements around the orignally advertised job times. It's a bit rubbish too, having to tell someone who has just finished their visit that they can't buy anything, because you have already closed the till up.

Mouth before Brain

1/6/2017

"I'm calling to check about visiting with someone who is blind. As their assistant, do I get free entry?"
"Yes you will, although they will need a ticket."
"Do we buy that in advance? Do we need to book anything?"
"You can just get tickets at the entrance desk, and then you're both welcome to simplylook around."

*Brain pauses*

"Uh, poor choice of words, I'm so sorry..."
*Laughing* "Not at all, at least you realised what you'd said!"

Mammoth Queues

4/11/2016

The Natural History Museum in London had a large family pleasing exhibition on mammoths a while ago.

In the summer school holidays visitors had a long queue to enter the building, and then another queue to enter the paid exhibition.

It was a bit of a surprise to find a stunningly unhappy bored looking child, whose parent had endured the entire thing and forced them to do so to, on the assumption that it was some kind of "sit down and watch the entertainment" type activity.

When told it was an exhibition, very exciting ancient things to see, they just left.

You can never be too careful

16/8/2016

Do you know that bit of Red Dwarf that goes "Everybody's dead, Dave.?"

"Hello, are you open on Bank Holiday Monday?"
"Yes we are!"
"Is all of the museum open on Bank Holiday Monday?"
"Yes. All areas are open."
"And is the cafe open on Bank Holiday Monday?"
"Yes, everything on site is open as usual"
"Is the gift shop open on Bank Holiday Monday?"
"Yes. All of our areas are open as usual on Bank Holiday Monday."
"I wanted to ask as your website said you'd be open, but you can never be too careful."

Multitasking is an illusion

24/6/2016

Most of the time multitasking is an illusion. You think you are multitasking, but in reality you're actually wasting time switching from one task to another.

(Bosco Tjan)

This one was drawn a while ago, reflecting a role I held at a council run venue about 9 years ago. I knew when I took it on that it was... varied... but what no-one had thought about was how one staff member would handle the different aspects if they all came along at once.

Because surely a school visit in the gift shop (they would try to eat marbles, thinking they were boiled sweets), visitors wanting tickets and phone calls won't ever happen at the same time?...

It seems apt to post it while the debate rages about staff cuts, roles being consolidated, pay cuts, unfair differences in pay grades for people doing the same job, replacing staff with cheaper contractors, and the impact on venue and artifact safety of these changes.

Last month, a museum that has lost all of its council funding posted a recruitment advert seeking a museum assistant. The responsibilities of the job included helping visitors, conducting guided tours and demonstrating exhibits, assisting with the use of equipment, and security patrols of the museum.

The advert continued: “This varied role will also include working with reception, ticketing, shop/cafe sales, cashing-up, stock control, answering the telephone and relaying messages.”

The salary offered – for a role spanning almost every public-facing aspect of the museum’s work – was £15,917-£15,941 a year (or £7.65-£7.66 an hour). The museum is by no means the only offender, but the advert is an indication that some cash-strapped institutions may be asking more of their employees for less than ever before.

This snippet is taken from some very interesting reading on the matter, see the Museums Association's full article about the impact of wages and roles on museums staff here.

Don't worry, there's chocolate coming.

14/10/2014

A submitted tale...

The first member of reception staff to arrive switches the phone settings from 'absent' to 'present', goes through the voice-mail, responds to anything urgent, and then checks emails.
My colleague came in, and found almost 20 missed calls from the previous evening, and around 10 from early that morning, but no messages left.
About 5 minutes before opening, the phone rang.

"Oh so you do have staff! I assumed that you were too busy drinking tea or playing croquet to bother even phoning me back! When do you actually open today?"

"Our hours are 12.00 to 4.30 on weekdays, I'm sorry if that wasn't clear in our voice-mail message when you called. Because you called after 4.30, and then before 12.00, there was no-one here to take your call, again I apologise if that wan't clear. And please be assured that I would have returned your call, but regrettably didn't have a number to return your call to."

"...well, Thank you!"

The gentleman had called almost 30 times, but hadn't listened to a word of our instantly played voice-mail message, preferring instead to immediately hang-up, get increasingly frustrated and continue wasting his own time.
The staff member was awarded that week's chocolate biscuit for handling an unpleasant visitor.

I am both impressed and vaguely concerned that this venue/team has a weekly award for having handled an unpleasant visitor. That either indicates a good sense of humour, or a worrying necessity for boosting morale in the face of unrelenting stupidity.

If you have a tale of museum, art gallery or heritage venue woe or comedy, do drop a line in, and it may even become a cartoon of it's own!

Doggy Bag

30/9/2014

Thanks to the new follower who submitted this tale of someone playing fast and loose with interpreting the rules for visiting their property. The lady with the dog was quite cheerful, and unaware of the issues behind the rules. Her friend was the one to argue the case, threatening to "write to your head office and ask for my membership to be refunded" if the staff "persisted in being petty and demanding."

The issue was resolved when the lady with the dog suggested he may get restless anyway, so if they put him in the car they'd be able to enjoy the house without him wiggling around.

Hello Caller, How May I Help You?

23/9/2014

Phone calls I, and a public facing team member in a heritage venue, have both had this past four days:

"I can't find the option I want on the website drop down menu, so phoned to arrange it in person"
"The option isn't on the website because we don't offer it any longer."
"You don't offer it online?"
"At all, it's not an option we provide at all. You can - "
"Who do I need to talk to to get that option?"
"..."

"My son was playing on the balance beams yesterday and fell off them, so I wanted to raise it as a concern."
"I'm very sorry to hear that, was he hurt?"
"Not so much, but his trousers have been washed twice and are still stained, I think you need different wood chips or something dryer in that area."

"Can you tell me what the soup of the day is in the cafe?"
"Of course I can find that out for you if-"
"Why do you need to find it out? Why don't you know?"
"I'm not based in the kitchen, but can ask them."
"Well, I suppose that'll do."

"It says on your website that some of your collection is in storage, I explained to my wife that it means it isn't on show, and that we won't be able to get in there, but she insisted I call to make sure. We did a tour of the stores at a museum in Birmingham a few years ago, and now she pretty much forces me to check 'can we see in the stores' every time we visit somewhere with an archive. So I'm sorry, but I have to ask or I won't hear the end of it."

Woof.

4/7/2014

This came form a fan: Phone call query (bear in mind we're a transport museum): 'Hello, could you tell me where your nearest dog show is?' What now?

No! The other Left!

5/6/2014

A phone call where a travelling visitor is lost, they're unfamiliar with the area, they can't spot any specific distinguishing features, as soon as you work out where they are - they're not there any longer as they're in a moving car, and then your directions are fruitless as they are quite a way off, have no map, no way to write down your instructions, and ask "can you tell my son as I drive?"

Spending the next 10 minutes on the phone to direct you across a city via your son shouting directions at you, occasionally too late to act upon them, so I have to keep re-routing you?

I honestly enjoy giving the kind of customer service that goes beyond customer expectation.